


but they never told you the price you pay (for things you might have done)

by thedorkone



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Character Study, Freeform, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 09:39:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11941398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedorkone/pseuds/thedorkone
Summary: You’re 25 when it happens.You and Jimmy get into a fight and he asks for space. The only space you give him is the one between you and his best friend Pete (you didn’t know you’d die that day; the blood from the bullet in your chest seeping in the cracks of the wooden porch of Pete’s house. You didn’t even really like him that much).-Rosita, a glimpse in the life.





	but they never told you the price you pay (for things you might have done)

**Author's Note:**

> sometimes you just gotta write your own content, man

You’re 25 when it happens.

You and Jimmy get into a fight and he asks for space. The only space you give him is the one between you and his best friend Pete (you didn’t know you’d die that day; the blood from the bullet in your chest seeping in the cracks of the wooden porch of Pete’s house. You didn’t even really like him that much).

-

You wake up to white mist. 

You’re not sure you’re awake. You’re not sure where you are. What you _are_ sure of is that you’ve never felt this kind of soothing peace, like your very existence is weightless and your only responsibility is just _being_ (you didn’t use to spend much time contemplating the afterlife, but if this is it for you, you guess you could be doing much worse).

-

-

You’re pulled back into consciousness and you breathe in harshly. The cold air burns your lungs and that alone is the worst pain you remember feeling since you bled to death on the same porch you’re choking down air on right now, the fading imprint of your blood staining the splintering wood under your hands.

-

Wyatt Earp is dead and when you try to go home, you find out that so are you (your mama faints when she sees you and you wish you could go back to the white numbing your senses; you feel the ghost of daddy’s scream coiling tight and cold in the pit of your stomach instead).

You learn of the curse, learn to stay away from the people you knew and to stick to yourself.

You get lonely, but you stay alive.

Well, as alive as you can be anyway.

-

You manage to avoid all the heirs, both the ones who embrace their destiny and try to break the curse, shooting bullets and opening portals that swallow wicked little things like you whole, and the ones who cower away from it, hiding in what the townsfolk call the Earp Homestead. 

You find things to keep yourself busy; studying, you learn, is something you’re somewhat keen on.

You learn the composition of the fabric of the universe and stay out of trouble as you watch the other revenants come back again and again, every time with a little less soul attached to their bodies. 

You keep tabs on your family, watch them grow up and grow old from afar, you see them live and love. You see them die.

You stick to yourself and survive.

-

The whole Warp Earp ordeal is a disaster in the making that goes ugly hard and fast.

The other revenants tried to rope you in, but you haven’t stayed alive this long by kidnapping little girls and taking them away from their families (you weren’t a little girl, but you remember what it’s like, knowing you have a family you can never return to).

Their plan backfires with a stray bullet from Warp’s daughter in his back and you all are left in a town with no heir and only one Earp left.

-

The new heir comes back to Purgatory, and this time things will be different; you can feel it in the place where Peacemaker put a hole in your chest the first time around.

So you try to stay as far away from the Earps as you can, and you manage, for a while. Until damn Doc Holiday comes swaggering into your life, all charm and dimples and a deal you can’t turn down.

You tell yourself you’ll be careful, you’ll help him reproduce whatever potion the super secret agency you’re supposed to know nothing about had Deputy Marshal Dolls on, and you’ll get protection and a sweet gig at Shorty’s for it.

You don’t expect to make friends, you don’t expect to fall for Doc and his gentle eyes and his quick wit, you don’t expect to connect with Waverly Earp in a way you’ve never had with anyone before, not even when you still let yourself get close to people.

You don’t expect Wynonna goddamn Earp or the uncomfortable jealousy simmering in her eyes whenever you’re close to Doc to turn into begrudging respect as the days go by, the hard shell of self-deprecating irony and sharp one-liners cracking around you, too, and she can’t find out who you are, she can never know.

\- 

You’re 25 but you’re also 127, and you never expected to find another family in this life. 

You never expected to belong again.

-

You save Waverly from that scrawny white kid with the frostbite and homicidal tendencies, and everything starts going south.

There’s a voice in your head that tells you _I told you so_ , but you ignore it, push it down and you keep on, trust your friends to keep your secret and fight by their side. After all, what’s the point of living forever if you can’t share that life with anyone?

They’re your family, they will not betray you.

-

The sight of Peacemaker blazing against the wood of the bar makes your skin crawl and your eyes burn, you shut them close and try to stay in control.

Of course Waverly told Wynonna, you’re an outsider and you should’ve known better. 

_I’ll kill you last_ she says, and you should’ve known better (you swallow down the bile rising up your throat that tastes like disappointment and paralyzing dread).

_I’ll kill you last_ she says and you’re a cornered beast and a fool for trusting anybody (daddy’s scream still echoes in your head again and you should’ve known better).

-

Wynonna is in front of you, laying on a pool table like a lamb ready for sacrifice, Waverly by her side, her guard down and her back to you, because they _trust_ you.

But she’ll kill you last, so you swallow drily and clench your trembling fists, take a breath and hold it in.

You’ll stick to yourself, you’ll survive. 

**Author's Note:**

> to the surprise of exactly no one, i latched onto Rosita with the intensity of a mama bear
> 
> someone please hug her, she's trying her best
> 
> title from Only The Good Die Young - Billy Joel because why the fuck not, right?
> 
> thanks to fullyajar for being a babe and betaing every jumbled mix of feelings i vomit on the keyboard


End file.
